Coming Soon: The Descent 2 FINALLY!

Great Posters for Great Films: 67

Feeding The Baby!

Children are selfish. There all me, me, me, me, money, money, money, and before you know it, they're requesting a damn pony. If ever a child asks me how my actual day is going, I might change my mind Childbirth is something that brings up fears in most people that makes them question their for-seeable future. GRACE is a movie that is very disturbing, much like paying homage to Hitchcock, Cronenberg, and Mr. George A. Romero. One of my favourite films is Little Otik about a wooden baby with an insatiable appetite, who may be a distant relative to Grace. That said, they may also be cousins to Rosemary's Baby. Something about squealing brats that will always put people on edge.

Directed by Paul Solet as his first feature. The story follows a pregnant woman Madeline, who has been dealt a hard luck hand of cards in life. A meddling mother-in-law, a deceased husband, and a dead baby whom she is still carrying after a horrific car accident that killed her husband. Encouraged to carry it to term, is an ordeal hard for any woman to chore. But Grace's former lover and midwife is on hand to ease the suffering. Madeline's love knows no bounds and the baby is brought back to life. With "special" dietary needs, so a trip to the market might be futile All hell breaks loose with the baby going into convulsions, bad body Oder, a kinship with flies and that incessant shrill crying, not to mention her endless hunger. Taking this brat to a play date at Gymboree is definitely a no go. What's a mother to do? Create a menu that consists of killing anything that gets between her and the straight descendant of Elizabeth Bathory.

Yes, this film might appeal to lesbian we-mens whom like corduroy jeans and the Indigo Girls. There is a subtle pace that works and the cinematography is beautiful, yet the story could have gone up a notch in the crazy department. Still the subtleties play well and this could keep going if it wanted to. If I were the mother I might want to introduce Grace to True Blood and give a warning to all monster-in-laws from hell to back the fuck off. Grace is a good enough watch and leaves you with a startling visual at the end that actually made me have a nightmare. Although the film centres around the breasts, lactation, erotic lacto-philia, and cannibalism, if you're a boob man you might love this stuff.


This movie could have been churned out for the bloody dimwitted and disgusting crowed, but it refuses to go down that path. Choosing to stick to the classic slow cooking horror genres that made them great. This was actually better than the straight to DVD It's Alive, only cause I can't get past Bijou Phillips stank skankness as a brooding mother. I recommend the classic It's Alive with Grace as the ultimate playdate from hell. Thing one goes out to little baby Grace and those babies from It's Alive, it's a bit fitting.

Scream Queen Boobs of the Month.

Whom can forget Rose Mcgowan's lucious chi chi's high-beaming through a sweater. A sweater of all things , jesus how big are her nipples anyways. Channelling Annette Furnicello and Jayne Mansfield for a new generation. Being some whoat of a scream queen with Scream, Death Proof and Planet Terror under those pendulous bodacious ta-ta's, she gets a nod. from me

Slutty Cinematic Moments: Take One

There are moments in movies that just forever burn into our stream of consciousness that for some reason or another just refuse to go away. Galaxy Of Terror was a film I saw when I was just a plucky kid, whom re-inacted the films most famous scene during recess to the kids of the playground. Made in 1981 and cause of great debate over the most famous scene that was later cut from some copies of the film. Leave it to spoil sports to ruin all the fun, Fun Sponge your table is ready. Any how, Taaffe O'Connell big moment was originally planed to be devoured by the large worm. Can you imagine the feign and shock when she was told that she would be getting some "pow chicca boom boom", from Willy The Worm. I believe that this is a role that Megan Fox will be playing in about ten years time. Especially if she keeps running her yap with the most bullshit Foxisms ever known to man. Popbitch, did an expose on Ms. Fox's whom the production team Of The Transformers franchise dubbed her, "Dumb as a rock" against Avril "My music is shit" Lavigne's "stupid as a box of hair". Sadly the box of hair won the sweepstakes on levels of stupidity.

What's amazing is that there is a website paying homage to the opus that has been long out of print. Seriously I am not kidding. So I scour bargain bins and car-boot sales looking for the mother load that is this movie. Still Mrs O'Conners's screams are oscar worthy, and any one whom can make you want to coil in fear then reach for the box of tissue soon afterwards, is my kinda gal. Staring Erin Moran or Happy Days fame, and Robert Englund and Sid Haig, this is a must-have for movie perv. Come to think of it I have had a few dates that ended the same way. And to quote Lydia Lunch, it doesn't mater whom you fuck or what you fuck, as long as you're fucking something, Taaffe might want to raise the bar a little higher in the sex partnerdepartment if you know what I am saying. I mean jesus the worm didn't even buy her dinner, how rude.